I'm baaa-aaack! My loyal readers (all what? 2 of you?) might have been wondering where I've been the past few weeks. Well, I danced the devious dance with death and survived unscathed. Well, mostly. I'm hoping this isn't a Final Destination- the grimm reaper is after me-type thing.
The chimney in my house crumbled in on itself and we had we turned on the heat, the exhaust would have backed up into the house, filling it with carbon monoxide. And we would have followed Billy Joel line of thinking that only the good die young. Or something like that. I only really know the version Glee ruined. Yes, Glee ruined a Billy Joel song. Quite a feat. Anyway, I could have died leaving only a legacy of disgruntled blog postings and a DVD/ book collection that belongs in a hoarder's house. I would have fallen very short of my goal of writing for a late night talk show or SNL or working on a TV show or at least having people read what I write. And putting my massive DVD/book collection in a library which would rival Belle's in Beauty and the Beast. This library would be all mine too... in my Scottish castle.
I allowed myself a short time to mope and contemplate my own mortality. It got to be real deep at times- like would I rather die quickly being blown up in the CDC or try to survive, but be eaten by a hoard of zombies? Well, I probably would have picked the CDC, but it seems as though I missed that chance. So I picked up my non-zombified pieces and carried on. Today I looked around at the customers shambling around the hell hole, confused by the make up counter at the center of the store and realized it could be worse- at least I have a brain instead of craving them. So in the words of lip synching drag queens everywhere- I will survive... and get a career I actually like... and a castle in Scotland. Ok, I might have embellished it a little.
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